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1. |
What A Life/Laugh It Is
05:40
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I wake up and I don’t care if anything goes wrong
Gives me lots of headaches when I don’t
Then I’ll get so bored I’ll take another route in vain
Knocking down the obstacles I face all the same
So take my advice, go to your house
You’re not like them
Got what I wanted
Not like I planned it
Giving me back my own advice, that’s nice
Is that what you wanted?
Another little blood-let…
Giving me a taste of my own device, that’s right
Giving my head an extra kick
It’s another thing you do for kicks
What a laugh it is
It’s hard to fake it along the way
When you don’t know the rules to the game
Then you learn with your heart stomped out
What being human means
If I have the time to rhyme
The petty problems of my mind
Guess I’m doing pretty good and I’ll be fine
Living your life like you got it on loan
Unlock your screen and live your dreams
Out through your telephone
Give yourself away to something that you hate
Watch your youthful dreams slowly drift away
Like the tide in a storm
Raises high, takes the shore
Don’t you run, don’t you hide
‘Cause we’ll be looking for you
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2. |
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Give up now
Empty your heart so I can drink it all straight down
Quench my thirst
It’s bitter and burns
And for this I yearn:
Good libations on dream vacations
If life’s a drag
Then why do we lament
That it goes by too fast
Strikes and constricts
When you can’t escape
That means you’re licked
There’s no feeling, hurt, or healing
If I meet my maker
I will tell her it’s okay, we tried
If the experiment has failed with us
For once we’ll bow out gracefully and die
Send a meteor, that’d be fine
It could be worse
I find no comfort in clichés
Got my cynical words
It’s so naïve to lay there and bleed
And not even be
On permanent vacation, good libations
We had our time
But now it’s running out
The dinosaurs took it in stride
Passenger pigeons didn’t mind
But we deserve to live and breed
More than them it’s our destiny
If this must end, please make it quick
Could get better in time
But I’m not positive
Definitely starting to think I’ll give up now
Empty my heart so you can
Drink it all straight down
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3. |
Losing My Mind
05:57
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They said just shut up
Get in line and drink this bitter cup
And when your number is called
Do what you’re told
You’ll be just fine
Losing your mind, again
I’ve hear ‘em say “man up”
Another one yelled “just be yourself”
Didn’t know what they meant then or now
And every time I’ve tried to jump right in
Join the crowd and be with them
I felt like a fraud
Losing my mind but I might just be overthinking
All the different ways I keep
Falling and stalling and it feels the same
They even try to make you pay
And I don’t really think there’s a way
Losing your mind, wasting your time
It’s in your mind, illusions of time
Losing your mind, wasting your life
It’s in your mind, wasting your life
Sometimes I can’t resist
All the stupid things I do
Headlights on my cheeks
I just freeze and give my worst to you
The walls close in
No sunlight blooms
Limited years in a windowless room
Still we laugh as if nobody dies
But if it went on forever would we have reason to cry
And hold on tight, care, and fight
Stay up all night
It’s a madness and I know that you’re losing your mind
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4. |
Abyss
05:11
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Fully facing towards the darkness
A truth that once can only be
Some say they are chance occasions
Snapshot glimpses only seen
So on those nights abyss invades you
Knocks you down to exceeding new lows
Perhaps the part that you gave away
Was only past due for the blue flame
I can’t say this from my lower self
Underneath a chaos hell
Some wish to be provided clues
Please let there be a guiding truth
Forever nights have helped some cope
And longer days with renewed hope
But would you say that as the dawn
Slips you up in ceaseless yawns
Sleeplessness one side effect
A freedom for with pay the price
We all do and the film will fade
The far beyond nearby awaits
Some wish to be provided clues
Please let there be a god and truth
On this ride that I don’t know when I get off
It’s borrowed time
On nights like these when I feel so defeated
And know there’s an end in sight
Feeling relief despite this
Anyway, I can’t see your light
So I’m giving up the fight
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5. |
Vivid Gardens
04:40
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I know I probably can’t complain
But I got this damaged brain
Somehow all the joy just gets away
Doctors give prescription pills
Tell me it’s all chemical
To balance out the hopeless doubts it helps
But nothing really takes me from this hell
Till you pulled me out from the murky waters
The quicksand grip had to quick
When you caught up and let free
The light that fades away
Got this barely beating heart
Needed you to give a spark
Now it’s fired up and pumping loud
Like impressionists would paint
Vivid gardens that vibrate
You’re the dancing color
I’m all gray
So lead me from the dark, I can’t escape
Well I guess I can get by on my own
But this middle ground just don’t satisfy
I’m kicking stones and getting by
But don’t we all need love to feel alive?
The light likes to hide away
It won’t settle for forever
But will always have our flame
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6. |
Didn't Know Home
05:43
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Rocking you is shocking
It’s so hard to believe
That my path could lead to this waking dream
And I can taste a sweetness which for long had eluded me
Everything is alright as long as I hear you breathe
Waking with a smile that contains eternity
Didn’t know home until you got here
Now that you’ve arrived
My heart is yours, dear
The fright of love’s delight for sudden flights
Just leads to sleepless nights
Until I hear a coo and sigh
In reveries, the purest kind
We can’t reside in this place very long
And if I dwell on this the tears come on strong
So I try a new perspective as I sing you to sleep
Thinking how I get to watch you grow
And what we’ll share although so brief
Despite this life
We made a light
To guide us through the darkest nights
And in that spotless joy I see
All the love the world could need
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7. |
Send Severed Angels
04:47
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They push you down, disgraced
But you’ll get them back someday
And until then stand like a severed angel with me
If you don’t like to see
Every subtle cruelty
That you paid for when you came into this circus tent
For the death-defying feats
And the sad eyed sideshow freaks
Where the laughs are cheap
For severed angels and me
Don’t give them today
Cause they’re not right
They wont you to slave
And give up with fight
Is that easier than living this weird and wild life?
Get back into your place
Amongst the human race
Get inside of your own ways
And get through it or you’re screwed
When they take you by the throat
Don’t bother fighting
They’ve already won
And forget all your promises
Cause they’re all done my friend
So just lay back and dream
It’s a fun and wicked fight
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8. |
Guise Of December
05:30
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This is about the time that I’d forget
Running through the place
Where we used to live in our minds
If it’s really that bad on the other side
Makes me wonder less
Why you want to die all your life
Now I roam through the halls
Of a home that will call me forever
And it’s no shame when you cry
As you glance at the guise of December in prayer
If we rejoice and praise, our souls will be saved
That’s a wager
If it’s logical or cynical I don’t mind
When in sleep I see green fields
Open, verdant don’t conceal the glory
Or the story of this life
Then there’s nights
I can’t get no rest
And when I do it’s nightmares and distress
Next day is a mess
When everything disintegrates
Sure, I’d like to go to your happy place
But just tell me
Why your story feels like a lie
This is your disaster
Giving up the only fight that matters
To disappointing masters in your head
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9. |
Pacing Around
04:11
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We are always pacing around
In this beat up burg
You couldn’t get very far
Unless you’re in too deep
And counting up scars
You can’t fake it
Won’t make it no more
I’m saying should we leave now
Or even the score
Instead we’re only pacing around
Forget what you learned
Keep your nose to the ground
You can bootstrap your way
To the top, we’ve been told
And fulfil the fable
Strike it out on your own
You won’t make it
Gotta ditch that naked soul
Just fake it
Shake this aberration and fold
At least we’re free to atrophy
Cash in, blood out
Always pacing around
This is what we came for now
All the blood we paid for
How could we waste it
When its crimson cup pours
We are the nascent
Yet to learn the rules of the road
We’re bound indeed to entropy
Cash in, blood out
Always pacing around
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10. |
These Tired Chords
03:37
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These chords are tired
Checked the label
They’ve long expired
And these words feel hackneyed, contrived
Worn apart by years of life
All of a sudden the creeping doubt just disappears
Takes some time for a hopeful rhyme to make it clear
It doesn’t matter in the end how you play pretend
I’m the prey that’s wounded
Cut me down and snap my neck
Cause I’m losing
Is this what you do for survival
Still I pretend to run like I’m free for a while
Fractals blaze a cloudy haze that burns like time
With blinking tears for a wasted year
You can’t rewind
Treat it with a pen
With more that’s left unsaid
All a man should do
As he wanders endless avenues
Spread a little sweetness
And don’t you want to try
Until our cover is blown
And we scrape and fall
Till the proud and tall prevail
This gun has misfired
The goddamn DOA flight risk: desire
Get to the station, inspiration dissipates
No fortunes told, just the rules of the road
And the luck you make
Doesn’t matter in the end
How you play pretend
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11. |
Save Me
05:32
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Don’t have the words
All out of time
Feeling awe-inspired
Now that I’ve reach the end
I want to start again
There comes a night
We’ll get off this ride
But I won’t leave you down
What if we reach the end
Then we can start again?
And if you could dream the end
What would you choose?
I thought that this could save me
Now I’m feeling insecure
And those aren’t angels baying
It’s the hounds of hell, I’m sure
One suit of skin, we stumble around
About to fall so low all alone
I want to go again
If you could dream the end
What would that be?
Got me tongue tied
Feeling so weak
And I’m outside looking in
But it’s weird
Existence is sand, slips through your hand
Unites us and bites us again
And when I reach the end
I think I’ll go again
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Sal Fiteni Lindenhurst, New York
Old time music for modern day lovers
Formerly Slip Silver. I also make music in bands such as Sister Kisser, Crow Bait, Dino Boys, and Troubled Hearts.
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